Kama one of the purpose of life

Kama sutra, is probably one of the most read and is probably one the most popular books of all times. Because of this books popularity, the word Kama is invariably associated with sex.
This leads to confusion as to why one of the objectives of the life as illustrated in the four Pursharthas is Kama? One of my friends raised this question and very rightly so  – “Vivek one of the thing amazes me is, our Indian Philosophy encourages Pursharthas (Dharma, Artha, Kama, Moksha) but why on the other hand Kama is to be shunned as part of six evils- Is this a dichotomy or an aberration?

Kama is a positive source of energy:

Similar question also bothered me in the past; however the explanation that I have found is very acceptable to me and needs to be shared with larger audience. Kama is not about the Sex alone. This term encompasses all the worldly desires (sex being just one of them). Human desires or Kama is a very potent force that leads to most of the actions and endeavors of mankind. Kama per say can be a very positive force if the mind, body and soul work in unison and make a positive usage of this “energy of desires, impulses and aspirations”. Behind our will power and actions there has to be a strong desire, a strong passion and a very good reason. Kama is all about that.

Kama per say is therefore not a negative term and should not be mixed up with the sex alone. Kama leads to “Karma or actions”. Kama or desires can be of multiple types for example: desire to acquire skills and knowledge, love and affection for even children which gets classified as “mamata”, desire to acquire wealth, desire to progress in life, desire to do research, desire to excel and make significant contributions in a chosen field or vocation, desire to leave behind a legacy, desire to get married and create a family, etc. Such desires in mankind have ensured the progress of humanity. The period of the Gruhastha ashram is to be dedicated to the fulfillment of such desires within the frame work of Dharma about which we talked about in the earlier blog post.

The suppressed desires are wasanas, they do surface unconsciously and create problems:

Wasana is another term which is highly misunderstood. Wasana means all those desires that are suppressed within us or are bottled-up, curbed and are latent in the minds. It is these bottled-up desires which make people do unpredictable things - unconsciously. In Hindu way of life, we believe that it is these curbed or latent desires that cause us to get a rebirth. Hence in the Hindu philosophy we never talk of suppression of desires we talk of management of desires. This means question your desires, challenge them and learn to channelize them, contain them rather than suppress them. 

There is nothing wrong in fulfilling all those desires which do not cause harm to others, which do not come in to the way of your own spiritual growth, which do not lead to compulsive or addictive behaviors. The most important principle being these desires and the fulfillment process has to be within the frame work of the Dharma tenets. The most important thing - the desire fulfillment process should not lead to imbalance in life and should also not lead to the imbalance of body, mind and soul about which we will deal with, in the next few blogs. Hindus have recognized the need for fulfillment of all the legitimate and natural desires of human beings. People however have to remain focused not only on the desires but also continuously evaluate the appropriateness of the process of their fulfillment.

Desires have no limits and the fulfillment process may not be right:

Let us talk of a simple desire like - I wish to visit Singapore, I have never seen this place. There is nothing wrong with this desire; it is very much within the boundaries of Dharma. If the desire is strong one works to save the money and is able to visit Singapore. Now another desire may come up – I want to live in Singapore – another legitimate and acceptable desire. Now with this new desire if it is compelling - one will start working towards fulfillment.  The process of fulfilling such a desire may lead the person to do things that are not necessarily bound by the tenets of Dharma. When questioned the person having such a desire may always justify saying he is just fulfilling a reasonable legitimate desire which is not against the religious tenets or Dharma.

In the quest of fulfillment of desires several people just burn out themselves. They may even dwell in to several undesirable actions. All of us are bound by the pros and cons of our own Karmas or actions. For everything that happens to us in this birth, or in the next birth, has a definite cause and the same is created by our own karmas or actions and most of our actions or Karmas are aimed at fulfillment of our desires..

The problem with the desire fulfillment process is, it has no end point. As one desire gets fulfilled, another set of desires take birth. In this illusionary world (Maya) the human beings keep creating several means of comforts, entertainment and temptations. The nature also creates several attractions. By the time you are thru with one, the other comes-up. We have to learn to deliberately draw a line somewhere and say – “so far and no further”. Enlightened clairvoyant souls have realized the futility of fulfilling the desires, the continuous birth of new desires and the pros and cons of actions that lead to fulfillment of the same. These enlightened souls therefore reach a stage wherein their mind gets focused on the Parma-atman or the creator, the God, and not on the worldly pleasures.

Kama is the reality:

For most of us who are part of the materialistic world the concept of getting detached from the desires of the life is very difficult to manage. We get so much attached to the worldly things, materials, possessions, people, near and dear once, position, power, wealth, etc that some time on the way we forget the ultimate purpose of our lives. 

We can however make an attempt.  If we understand that non fulfillment of desires / expectations is the cause of frustrations, envy, anger and negativity of all types, it becomes a good beginning. One should start questioning everything that comes to our minds, start challenging the desirability of our newly born and the latent desires. This in itself is half battle won. One should also start thinking of the process of fulfillment of chosen few desires and start testing the process with our own capabilities, aptitude, the road blocks and the methods to overcome the same, this in turn should be tested with the tenets of the Dharma. Such a process will ensure we focus on critical few and we manage and contain what is not desirable. We have to accept that happiness does not come from the fulfillment of desires, it comes from being comfortable with your-self, it comes from sharing and giving – refer to my first blog on Pearls of Wisdom.

Human beings should live a complete life - Upanishads

This means:

 A life that is Soundaryapurna or Beautiful. Most of the wise persons looking at your life should say that this is a beautiful balanced life. Beauty referred here is the internal or intrinsic beauty of your personality & the achievements you made in your life. Beauty of your values, love and compassion with humbleness.

A life that is Sukhamaya or full of Happiness. Happiness coming from the inner self and this should not be confused with pleasure, joy or fun, which are short term.

  

A life that is Tejomaya or full of brightness or aura that you acquire. Aura or Tej  comes from several sources.

1. Due to Knowledge you acquire and share with others
2. Due to Contributions you make
3. Due to Spiritual development  the serenity or Satvikta that you develop.

A life that is Parakrami: The challenges that you take, your  accomplishments, significant contributions that you make to the society in a chosen field, significant road blocks that you bust – all for the right causes.

Artha and Moksha:

Up till now we have dealt with Dharma and the Kama. Artha and Moksha are the other two Pursharthas, about which we will talk about in the next two blog posts over one week.

Disclaimer: The pictures in this post are downloaded from Google images.